REAL ME RIGHT NOW

Sunday, December 31, 2017


I've grown up an awful lot this year. It's a different kind of growing though. I'm still 5'3. and boy, that isn't changing in the near future. I still love the sound of wind shield wipers, making apple pie, slapping paint on walls, summer (dude. for reals. I love it even more), the click of a seat belt, counting all my books, ice cream...you know, all the little weird things I talk about that make people laugh and me happy.

but I'm growing up. which is something I've fought for years. You'll know that if you've followed me for some time. I'm not grown up. but I am growing. huge difference there folks.

I feel braver (in a scared sort of way)
I feel a little less unsure of myself which means I'm more sure of myself which is a good thing. if I'm careful and not cocky.
I'm ok with being me - even tho people laugh at me cuz they don't get me. (tbh I don't either. I'm just rolling with it)


I'm growing less afraid of growing. ask my best friend. she'll know what I'm talking about.
also God made me aware of a lot of things. like sobbing breakdowns can be a good thing - speaking from experience, i promise.

it's a weird thing to be a human. that might sound utterly creepy and odd to you, but if you think about the complexity of what we deal with on a day to day basis, you might just agree. like what else has to deal with car insurance, friend conflicts, figuring out what to order at Arby's, or job interviews. it's just a fact. this is what we've been given. this is life for humans.

and we humans make it even more complicated.

so maybe I'm speaking nonsense. btw, I really love that you guys are okay with my basically essay poems over here. should I do more?

xxxxx

[p.s. huge shoutout to Hanne T for being my 70th follower! thanks for helping me hit that mark on the last day of 2017 <3333]

24 comments

  1. this post :')

    Growing up is something I've wrestled with for like, the past year or two. It's such a weird yet strangely beautiful thing. And I love what you said about how being human and our lives. YES. preach.

    Happy 2018, Jules :D

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    1. aw thx <3

      hmm yes. I know. and it is! it's also really hard. XD

      happy 2018 Amelia <333

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    2. lol I just came back to this post now and "Amelia" xDDD I guess I could go by that too :P

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    3. uh. I AM SO SORRY LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! obv I was tired. uhg. sorry Autumn ;)

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  2. <3333

    - Maddy | littlebitofsunshineweb.blogspot.com

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  3. YESYESYES. 2017 has been a year of a lot of growing up for me as well. 2018 will be an even bigger year (moving out!! college!). And yes, humans are messy and hard and because of that, things become messy too. But it's what was meant to be.

    (also hi yay! I'm glad I got to help you reach a goal! <3)

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    1. *nods* I guess that's a good thing! (woooah bro LOTS A BIG STUFFS) you've totally got this. Praying for you <3 hmm. yes. truth

      (*grins* THANKS FOR REALS <3)

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  4. Ok wow, I have never identified with a piece of writing this this! I really love this style too!! Keep doing more!

    Lilah
    lilahsmusicals.blogspot.com

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    1. girl you have no idea how much that means to me!! thanks <33 and I'll try XD

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  5. *grins at you* you're growing, dear, and I'm proud of you <333

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    1. *grins back at you* *tosses wild snowball* oh silly, thx <3 I'm proudest of you tho ;)

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  6. wow!!! this was so perfect. thank you for sharing <3 <3

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  7. So cool!! I totally get you girl -- the not being grown up but growing, that makes perfect sense. <333

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    1. *nods* it's an interesting place, huh? XD

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  8. Oh, I love you, Julia <333333333

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  9. essay poems for days, babe. i think i like them a whole stinking lot. x

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    1. well i'm glad bc i've got a lot more xxxxxx

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  10. SOBBING OVER THIS POST

    I couldn't have related more. <3 KEEP IT UP GIRLY!

    xx Kenzie

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    Replies
    1. SOBBING OVER YOUR COMMENT

      dude. that's the biggest compliment. THANKS <333333

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dude you make my day with comments *wipes tear dramatically* *gives you a hug*

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